Ranking Comfort Foods

What constitutes a comfort food? According to Wikipedia, a reputable source if ever there was one, “Comfort food is food that provides a nostalgic or sentimental value to someone, and may be characterized by its high caloric nature, high carbohydrate level, or simple preparation. The nostalgia may be specific to an individual, or it may apply to a specific culture.” I’ve also heard people say that a comfort food needs to be warm, or needs to be cheesy, or anything along those lines. From my experience, it’s a specific food you can eat that makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside- whether from enjoyment of the taste, or happy childhood memories, or appealing to base human needs like the love of carbohydrates.

So, I’m taking what Wikipedia listed as “American comfort foods” and ranking them according to my personal tastes. Feel free to agree or disagree (in the comments if you want, or you can yell your opinion from the rooftops) but given that I’m sitting here on my laptop feeling hungry, this seemed like a good idea.

32. Tamale pie
I’ve never liked tamales, so it stands to reason I wouldn’t like them in pie form either.
31. Grits
They’re very… gritty. I don’t like them either.
30. Red beans and rice
Okay, so I’m not from the South, which is probably why these are so low. I’ve rarely had them if ever, and they really don’t scream “comfort” to me.
29. Chicken soup
I know I’m in the minority here, but I’ve never really been able to stand chicken noodle soup (and other varieties). It’s soggy and salty and ruins its ingredients.

28. Peanut butter
Is peanut butter good with things? Yes. Is it a food, let alone a comfort food? I’d say no.
27. Pepperoni rolls
I’ve never really had these, but I imagine they’re kind of like hot pockets without all the sauce. Either way, I’m not a big pepperoni fan.
26. Chicken and dumplings
I’ve had good chicken and dumplings on occasion, but usually it’s a soggy lump of dough in sodium-drowned chicken.
25. Chili mac
Why would you ruin macaroni and cheese? That shouldn’t be possible.

24. Corned beef and cabbage
There is a time and a place in my house for corned beef and cabbage. They taste really good on St. Patrick’s day. Any other time, I could take or leave them.
23. Chowders (Clam chowder, Shrimp chowder, Corn chowder, etc.)
I’ve had some pretty good chowder, and some pretty bad chowder. It balances out to “okay.”
22. Chili
I tend to like the red meat of chili (given that it isn’t too spicy) compared to chowder, but they rank about the same.
21. Cornbread
Cornbread is pretty good, but it serves as an accessory to chili.

20. Biscuits and gravy
When done right, delicious. When done wrong, soggy.
19. Tuna casserole
As long as the tuna isn’t too overpowering, it’s warm and comforting. As a comfort food should be.
18. Casseroles
However, casseroles other than tuna (chicken, tater tot, etc.) are superior.
17. Green bean casserole
This is the best one though, it tastes like Thanksgiving.

16. Cupcakes
Cupcakes can be really really good. However, they also have the occasional propensity to be nothing but artificial tasting cake buried under a mountain of frosting. Don’t do that.
15. Cake
Less likely to be buried under chemical frosting.
14. Chocolate chip cookies
If the cookies are fresh? Definitely a comfort food. Warm, melty chocolate chip cookies are heaven.

13. Pizza
A true childhood staple. Carbs, sauce and cheese. Delicious.
12. Pot roast
When well cooked and tender, this is definitely a comfort meal. However, it’s usually paired with another food that ends up higher on this list.
11. Meatloaf
Something about this is just really delicious to me. Sure, it’s a vaguely concerning brick of meat slathered in ketchup, but it’s a brick that reminds me of childhood.
10. French fries
Take a slice of potato, fry it in oil, add copious amounts of salt, and you have one of the true American foods. Good from fast food, or even better homemade. Best with ketchup.

9. Burrito
The question: How many things can we stuff inside a tortilla? The answer: yes. Preferably with guacamole.
8. Apple pie
Another “American” food, and one of the most comforting desserts. Tart apple and sweet crust pair well together. My mom is really good at making this, so it ranks especially high for me. Especially good if you add caramel, or make it a la mode.
7. Fried chicken
There’s something so homey about the crunchy, salty outside of fried chicken paired with meat inside. It’s an all-purpose meal that never fails to fill you up.

6. Chicken fried steak
Fried chicken, but better. Especially with gravy.
5. Ice cream
One of the most customizable, all-purpose desserts ever to exist. Ice cream is the one dessert I could never possibly get tired of. Tillamook is the best variety, but any chocolate or cookie dough flavor is among the best. And vanilla pairs with anything.
4. Lasagna
While homemade lasagna is otherwise my favorite meal, I’m ranking meals by comfort food, not by how much I love them overall. And also, so many people have only ever had the frozen stuff that won’t hold a candle to lasagna’s real potential. Lasagna is amazing, but doesn’t get the #1 spot here.

3. Grilled cheese sandwich and tomato soup
This is when it gets hard- my three favorite comfort foods. Grilled cheese really gets the cheese fix, especially when you use the right cheese (cheddar). Tomato soup is essential to the combo, and really sets off the simpler flavors of the sandwich for a heartwarming and unmistakably comforting food.

2. Mashed potatoes
Something about the creaminess of mashed potatoes is impossibly amazing. You can add almost anything- sour cream, garlic, etc.- and it will work well with the comforting carb base of potato. Please, please, do add gravy. It’s delicious. Making a volcano of gravy with mashed potatoes is an absolute staple of childhood. A perfect addition to any meal, but not necessarily a meal in itself, and so it doesn’t quite make it to the top spot.

1. Macaroni and cheese
I’ve already written a post about how I think mac and cheese is best to be enjoyed, at my blog post you can find here (https://dorathywriting.poetry.blog/2020/02/06/the-process-of-macaroni-and-cheese/), so now I’ll just talk about its merits in general. To quote from the post, “it’s warm, cheesy, gooey, filling, reminds people of their childhood- it ticks off any and all boxes for comfort food that could be ticked.” It’s everything you could want in a meal and more. And if it isn’t, there are infinite possibilities! Want meat? Add meat. Want different sauce flavors- hot sauce, barbecue sauce, tomato sauce? Do whatever your heart desires! Macaroni and cheese is the ultimate, #1 comfort food.

So, that’s my imperfect listing of my opinions on comfort foods. What’s your favorite comfort food? Did it make the Wikipedia list? Did I rank it incorrectly? Let me know in the comments!